Your Law of Attraction Questions Answered -FREE!

by LOA Guru Jack Cox

Legal disclaimer: All answers are given in good faith but no responsibility can be accepted for the consequences of following the advice given.

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Your questions answered free:

Question:  Greetings Jack, In what seems like a coincidence, I came upon your site just about an hour ago, after having read last night a well-known blogger's view of child abuse in terms of the LoA.   What he wrote seemed - to me - to be the most dismissive and ludicrous position one could possibly take.  I would be very curious to find out what you think of it, if you get a moment.  Just let me know if you would care to tell me, and I will send you the link.

I should mention that, being a survivor of it myself, I more or less use child abuse as a gauge for any system of metaphysics, philosophy or religion (in other words, "Does this model adequately address the issue of child abuse, or does it just blow it off with some kind of fluff ?").

One thing you wrote as an answer to a person's question kind of seemed like a reasonable way to frame child abuse in relation to the rest of life; it was the part about why people climb mountains and so forth.  You had speculated that maybe people undertake certain challenges before birth.  I too strongly sense reincarnation to be a reality. Prior to now I have also strongly sensed that the notion of child abuse is one's karma being paid from actions in another life ...but something tells me that is *at least not always* the case.

By the way, I have never read or seen "The Secret".  I had heard a little about it and decided it sounded patently false because I was thinking of the many instances of unrequited love, which generally invests much mental energy into visualizing scenes with the love object for example. However, your website disabused me of that impression by clarifying that real people should not be expected to respond to paradigms of our construction for them, because they have their own minds, vision, etc.

Jack's Answer: Hi C.J.  Although you gave me your name in full I have abbreviated it here to safeguard your privacy. Yes of course, if you send me the blogger's link I will be happy to give my opinion.

Normally I try to avoid writing about child abuse, believing such things are better addressed by those who have more knowledge and experience in that field than I do. In general terms though I agree with what you say. Like you, my personal belief is that we decide on our parents and the conditions of our early lives before we are born.  I think we choose these challenges so we can learn and grow by overcoming them. These are my personal beliefs and I state them purely in that context. However you and I are not alone in these beliefs and a lot of research as been done in this field by Dr. Helen Wambach and others.  Of course other people have other ideas about these things and they have just as much chance of being right as we have.

However what is really important is that we do overcome whatever difficult start we may have had in life. The growth is in the overcoming. Some people (and I really do feel for them) get stuck in the pain, blame, hatred and resentment and as a result never achieve their true potential in life. What is important is to take 100% responsibility for being abused.  This is where people get stuck, they think I am talking about blame.  They think I am saying it was somehow their fault they were abused. Responsibility has nothing to do with blame or fault, it is about how we respond. .

It is easy to get suck in a victim consciousness. People think I am being cruel and heartless when I say "So you were abused as a child, so what?"  Of course what happened was terrible.  Being abused by your own father or mother or both (or by another close family member, or whoever it was) is hard to even imagine for most people. To be let down like that by someone who, as a young child, you are hard wired to trust implicitly, is one of the most disturbing ways to begin life. But look at the lives of countless thousands of successful people and see how many of them had terrible things to overcome.

Look at the life of the British physicist Stephen Hawking, CH, CBE, FRS, FRSA . He is known for his contributions to the fields of cosmology and quantum gravity, especially in the context of black holes. He has also achieved great success with his book,  A Brief History of Time, which stayed on the Sunday Times bestsellers list for 237 weeks! He also wrote The Universe in a Nutshell. All this and much more despite having  amyotrophic lateral sclerosis (Lou Gehrig's disease), a type of motor neuron disease, a condition that has progressed over the years and has left him almost completely paralyzed. By 1974, he was unable to feed himself or get out of bed. His speech became slurred so that he could only be understood by people who knew him well. In 1985, he caught pneumonia and had to have a tracheotomy, which made him unable to speak at all. A Cambridge scientist built a device that enables Hawking to write onto a computer with small movements of his body, and then have a voice synthesizer speak what he has typed. What an inspiration to us all !

Look at the life of Helen Keller, (1880 – 1968) an American author, anti-war activist and lecturer. She was the first ever deaf and blind person to earn a Bachelor of Arts degree. The story of how hers teacher, Annie Sullivan, broke through the isolation imposed by a near complete lack of language, allowing the girl to blossom as she learned to communicate, has become known worldwide through the dramatic depictions of the film The Miracle Worker.

These and many thousands of other stories are what I mean my "So what?". I know there people were not abused as children, their challenges were different than yours.  The important thing is to be able to chunk up and down appropriately to see the similarities. We all have "so whats", some bigger, some smaller, but we all have them. The difference is how we respond to them. People who choose (and it is a choice) to hate their abusers, to let their minds dwell on thoughts of hatred and revenge, only hurt themselves. All the great teachers who have ever lived tell us to forgive those who hurt us and to love our enemies. Why?  Not to turn us into sanctimonious goodie goodies, that's for sure. They teach these things because they work, because when we harbour loving thoughts we attract corresponding loving conditions into our lives.

Anyway I hope you will find my answer of some interest and if you send me the other guy's link I shall be glad to comment on the content of his blog.

Before closing let me very quickly say something about unrequited love.  I think the problem here is not so much to do with the thoughts we think while in love, but rather the thoughts and beliefs we have which cause us to choose the wrong people to fall for in the first place. This is a huge subject and I have written an article about it called Love and the Law of Attraction. I have also written an article on beliefs which you may enjoy.

© 2008, 2009 Jack Cox - All Rights Reserved.